


Linger

by kmichs



Category: Naruto
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-14
Updated: 2018-06-14
Packaged: 2019-05-23 03:39:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14926412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kmichs/pseuds/kmichs
Summary: Sasuke learns that it wasn't just a pair of eyes that he took from Itachi.





	Linger

Linger

In the middle of what could have been an ordinary night, Sasuke woke up in a panic, temporarily forgetting where he was as the remnants of a nightmare slipped to the back of his mind. Though he realized that he was completely alone, he reeled to regain his stoic composure—his breathing slowed, his fists unfurled into soft hands on his knees. The darkness surrounding him was a result of the night, not his ailing eyesight. No, his formerly-ailing eyesight, he had to remind himself. Here in the darkness everything was all the same.

  
Ever since he'd taken his brother's eyes several weeks prior and he’d had time to recover, the world was crystal clear once more. Leaves looked less like a foreign, watery landscape and more as they should be: crisp, green leaves. Headaches no longer plagued him like an old memory.  
In the darkness, he navigated his way outside where a crescent moon shone on him like an intense spotlight, as if to announce his presence to the nature surrounding him. The world did not care. Insects disturbed the potential for quiet out here but Sasuke did not mind. The sound gave him something to focus on as he closed his eyes, choosing now not to see the world beyond him.

  
With his head tipped back, hair brushing his neck, the boy wished for rain, a soft cleansing of all he'd done to get here. In another life, things would have been different. In such a life, there would be no reason to have taken Itachi's eyes because Itachi would still be here. Maybe they'd be happy.

  
Considering what could have been always triggered something in Sasuke that he could never put words to. A groggy feeling in his gut reminded him not to dwell on how this could have turned out. He had no time to dwell on could-have-been scenarios now. Regardless, he entertained the thought for a second too long and too much thinking caused tears to pit in the corners of his eyes and here he wished for rain evermore. Nature deserved to feel the same remorse and sorrow that nested in the furthest corners of his being.

  
Unfortunately for Sasuke’s emotions, the sky remained starry and clear. The stone floor beneath his bare feet was cold but not uncomfortable. He continued to stare at the sky until his neck began to ache.

  
Snapping his head back to a neutral position once more, Sasuke turned to retreat back into Madara’s hideout but was interrupted by something.

  
A simple vision entered his mind. It felt real. Maybe it was. A glimpse of some place Sasuke had never seen before from the perspective of another. Unlike here, he found himself in the daylight, somewhere near water. In that moment, Sasuke could smell an ocean. The landscape was fleeting, leaving the smell to dissipate as quickly as it came.

  
There was no way to tell if the memory came from inside him or out, but regardless Sasuke found himself on the ground, cradled into a form as small as he could muster. The stone beneath him was unforgiving as he shivered in the summer night. Here he stayed until the chills passed and were replaced by a will to go back into the hideout, to return to bed. Sasuke could not go back to sleep; the memory stayed with him like a familiar song.

  
When the morning came, Sasuke was still craving that whiff of the ocean that plagued him so many hours ago. The vision that carried him through the night never left his mind and he never fell back asleep. As the sun crept over the horizon, Sasuke was nothing but exhausted. He hadn’t slept so little since the night Itachi had died by his hand.

  
He did his best to keep this memory to himself, to not share this lingering obsession with anyone, especially Madara, who was keeping an exceptionally close eye on him. Madara was the only one he interacted with on a regular basis, anyway, ever since abandoning Taka at the Kage’s Summit. To no one’e surprise, silence held a vice over the two of them as they shared breakfast. This was not a common thing they did together, but a good time for Madara to inform Sasuke about the happenings of the outside world. Sasuke knew war was coming.

  
“I’m going to take a walk,” he announced when the meal was done. The first spoken word since the meal had begun. There were no updates today.

  
“Stay close,” Madara warned him. “Everyone is on guard.” Sasuke knew all too well that he wasn’t to participate at Madara’s order.

  
Though the wind was calling him, Sasuke did not go far from the hideout. To him, going too far meant getting too lost in thought, not getting caught by an enemy. That he could easily take care of. His own mind, however, he could not escape.

  
That ocean was still stuck between his ears and there was nothing he could do to shake the thoughts. He didn’t know where such an ocean lived, and even if he did there was no time to visit and admire the horizon. He could do that just fine here, with the unknown memory. He could close his eyes and hear the birds, smell the salt. It all stuck with him like a natural disaster.

  
He was leaning against a tree, watching a different but the same horizon when he encountered is next vision, the next memory to haunt him.

  
He found himself at a battlefield, or it looked like one at first glance. No, Sasuke recognized this place, he realized after adjusting to the new setting—this was a training ground Orochimaru had created for him back when he was younger. Years ago, bodies adorned the meadow where Sasuke had taken out an entire army singlehandedly as practice. For what, he no longer knew.

  
He remembered this place well, but something about the perspective was off. He appeared to be viewing the scene long after Sasuke had left, from a different angle, leaving him to accept he was watching the scene through someone else’s eyes. Only the grass lazily blowing beneath him moved to prove the memory was dynamic.

  
In this second vision, two things stuck with Sasuke: a feeling of consternation and a firm hand on his shoulder. Was it there for comfort? The whole thing felt too real to have been a mere vision; Sasuke found himself gripping his hands on his shoulders back in reality to make sure no one was really there, holding him gently but still against his will. But he was truly alone in the middle of these woods; the hand came and went as quickly as the image of the battlefield disappeared.

  
This made him forget about the ocean almost entirely.

  
Sasuke regained his composure once more, physically letting go of himself as he stood to return to the hideout. He took a short walk as he had stayed true to his word and hadn’t gone far. There was no telling how long he was gone, but as he approached the small mouth of the cave they were dwelling in, Madara was waiting for him, arms crossed.

  
“I hope that whatever is on your mind will soon come to pass,” Madara said upon the boy’s return, strict and somber as Sasuke himself aimed to be. Here, Sasuke felt a pang of some emotion he was unfamiliar with—embarrassment or shame? He couldn’t rightly tell—but it was due to the fact that Madara knew something was wrong that Sasuke had no intentions of disclosing. This was his nightmare to live.

  
The ocean and the training ground were now connected in Sasuke’s mind, but there was no telling as to how other than their unwarranted presence in his thoughts. Furthermore, he had no idea whose perspective he was viewing the scene from, nor did he know whose hand was on his shoulder in that fleeting moment.

  
Plagued with nightmares worse than usual for two nights after these visions, Sasuke continued to keep it to himself, and he did so well. Madara was often gone, leaving Sasuke to do as he pleased around the hideout. Solitude was always a comfort to him, especially now.

  
The third time around, Sasuke found himself at that beach once more. Salt burned at the cuts he didn’t know he had on his legs—he was standing knee-deep in the water. The pain was real. Through his eyes, he could see a man being held by the neck just before him. He could feel the smooth skin in his hand, it was almost comforting in its warmth. At least it served as a distraction from the pain of the cuts in the salt water.

  
This time, more than just an image flooded through his mind, there was sound, too. Seagulls crying into the open sky, water rushing in the void of an ocean. The man was pleading, perhaps for his life.

  
“I’ll never speak ill of him again,” the man said. Sasuke didn’t recognize him, but he had the appearance of a shinobi. Sasuke didn’t see a forehead protector but he could feel the man’s chakra in his palm.

  
“You won’t get a chance.” This voice came from the inside. Sasuke heard it but couldn’t quite recognize it. It was too faint, too clouded, like murky, unfamiliar water where sound was muffled beyond recognition.

  
The vision ended before the man’s life was taken from him, but the internal threat was a giveaway that whoever was holding the man by the neck was going to kill him. This didn’t leave Sasuke shaken, but he figured it should have. Onward he wandered into the hideout until he was nearly lost, but he felt more missing on the inside than the out.

 

 ___________________

 

Something in the night called his name. It wasn’t the insects, chirping their dissonant melodies, but something beyond them. He couldn’t put his finger on what it was, but he also couldn’t sleep.

  
Three more lonely days had passed, and he was honestly feeling fine. He was just glad he could see clearly. He admired the crescent of the moon, wondering how he possibly could have taken it for granted before, when he had his own eyes. Back when things were normal. Not okay, but normal.

  
Catching himself thinking about his brother, specifically his eyes, had been happening much too often as of late. How long had it been since he’d died? Sasuke couldn’t remember anymore; too much had happened, too many days flooded together. Sasuke hadn’t slept much since that fight. Dark circles made a home under his eyes but he did not care. He was not tired. He was hungry for vengeance, always alert.

  
It had been three weeks since he’d killed Danzo, the first step in letting his brother truly rest in peace. Three weeks since he’d run into his old teammates. A part of him wished he could have seen the look on Naruto’s face when they confronted each other. He’d see next time. He’d be ready next time.

  
He stood to leave, to try to go to bed, to be welcomed by another waking nightmare. He had been waiting for it and he was ready. Maybe he knew it was to come, but regardless it came. He balled his hands into fists and gave in to the cold that overtook him.

  
In this other world, it was raining, and the sky was murky and unsettling. Clouds moved rapidly through the evening’s light, but a full moon cast itself down on the scene. The view was murky, but Sasuke chalked it up to the rain beyond him.

  
Through such  rain, Sasuke heard a voice that he was sure he knew from somewhere but couldn’t place a finger on it.

  
“It’s too bad about your younger brother.” Rain colliding with the earth below strangled the voice.

  
Sasuke’s view shifted slightly to the left, looking back at the man who had just spoken. The rain blurred the scene regardless, casting a reflective haze on the sight. Sasuke caught a glimpse of blue, a shred of an Akatsuki cloak.

  
“He’s not dead,” the muffled voice said, and Sasuke was ripped back to reality. He was left gasping for breath, realization cresting over him like a rough, cold, unforgiving wave. Even in the distortion of the water, there was no mistaking the red cloud Sasuke saw.

  
Everything was suddenly falling into place like a perfect puzzle. It was Itachi. He was getting a glimpse of Itachi’s memory. It took this instance for it all to make sense. He was viewing remnants of his brother’s life through his eyes, literally. It was him at the beach. His feelings of apprehension at the battlefield. It was his kill that Sasuke felt in the palm of his hand. It all made sense.

  
Impatience coursed its way through him as he waited for the next one. The inevitable was immeasurable. Not only was he craving a glimpse of his brother’s life, he was depending on it like a heavy drug. In every waking moment, he was thinking about the ocean. The voices. The rain.

  
Sasuke drummed his fingers on the table before him as he waited. He was growing ever impatient. He knew he should be dedicating his time to training, preparing to crush the village he once called home, but he couldn’t move. He was frozen except for the pattern of his fingertips on the smooth wood below. Where was Itachi now?

  
Madara sat across from Sasuke at the table. Talking was a strong suit for neither of them. They sat in silence. Sasuke didn’t look up. He knew he’d just catch that one eye, boring a hole through him.

  
“There’s something you’re not telling me,” he said.

  
This gave Sasuke the will to get up and leave. “I have nothing to tell you,” he said, attempting to shove his usual pride into his voice, wavering severely as his voice cracked with disuse. He hadn’t spoken in days. All he did anymore was wait.

  
The moon expanded to its fullest in the coming week. Sasuke watched it as if it were a clock, each second passing by a moment wasted. He should have gone to bed long ago, but all that would accomplish was a plague of nightmares that he couldn’t shake.

  
Something inside him wanted to recoil in the stillness of the night. It was so loud out here, how could Sasuke stay silent and still in all the chaos? Suddenly he wanted to scream but couldn’t get all the air into his lungs. He held it in. He always held it in. This should be no different.

  
Drowsiness crept up on him like the sunrise did. He slept until Madara kicked him awake, reminding him that he could not stay outside the hideout for long. Sasuke begrudgingly went inside. Resumed the waiting game from his bed.

  
There, it happened. Sasuke was suddenly no longer in his room. He was at the Uchiha hideout. He could see himself. It was the final fight. The last time Sasuke had known true peace or contentment. When things were simpler, when there was one enemy and he was on the brink of eradication.

  
Itachi was looking Sasuke dead in the eyes in this memory.

  
This time, the memory left Sasuke numb in the hands. It was like looking into a mirror, the way Itachi stared at him in his final moment. It was blurry; Itachi’s sight was going out at the time, too, but they were close enough to where Sasuke could see the fear in his own eyes. He was reliving that fear in this moment. The battle was over. Sasuke had won. They both knew it.

  
Sasuke heard his only brother speak his final words before his vision went dark for good.

  
This really would be the last time, brother. In the darkness, peace fluttered over the boy in a cool, collective sweep, getting a glimpse of the world through a braver man’s eyes.

  
This was all Sasuke needed to know. He had known it was to come. He entered the battle knowing he was not going to leave.

  
“Good bye, brother,” Sasuke whispered when he was returned to the present. Those familiar tears of salt pooled in the corners of his brother’s eyes. He knew no one was here to witness him. No one was there to accept the farewell as his words disappeared into the relentless world beyond him.

  
Yes, this was truly the end. The wait was over.

**Author's Note:**

> lmao hi I've never posted on archive before and I don't know anything about formatting so lmk if this is okay??? Thanks I love u all


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